Often time, we are easily drawn to take the path of others. Impatience and lack of clarity have made us live on the Why and purpose of others. When I was a teenager, there was this beautiful lady who was humble and very intelligent. I loved her and wanted to be like. She was a light in the midst of darkness, an inspiration in the midst of demotivation. She was very good in accounting. Her dream was to be an accountant. Fortunately or unfortunately, her dream became my dream. I did not have any reason or WHY for my sudden interest in accounting and banking. It was simply based on what she decided for her life. I went further to study Banking and Finance in school while she could not further her higher education.
In my 3rd year in school, I got connected for the first time to my essence. At that moment, I realized my life vision. I vowed, since then, not to do any job that was banking or finance related. I became rather interested in service, impact, and community development. Why am I sharing this story? The reason is, more often than not, what drives most of us is the WHYs of others. We base our life’s decisions and purpose on the reasons and essence of others. It is even worse in these times of active social media. You are subtly programmed and attracted to the personal life design of others. You are discreetly influenced to live in the shadows and big WHYs and life purposes that you don’t understand. Quite a few individuals are able to live above this.
A life that is designed to progress and live sustainably is that which is driven by a personal compelling WHY. That which is from the being. The inmost being. Your life purpose is the WHY that is triggered by your encounters, experiences and personal identity. A WHY that speaks the totality of your inner conviction. A WHY that is forced from anger or a defining moment to fulfill the taste and gap that exists in your mind and the environment you find yourself. It is that singular thing which connects the dots of your lives from the day you were born to the moment that you decide to make such decisions.
We are all triggered to desire something. A mere want and wish are not enough. Rarely wanting something is not an effective strategy for personal effectiveness, growth, and sustainability. For example, you want to become a nonprofit leader, it is not enough to say I want to make an impact. It has or should have substance and a connecting impact that makes your reasons and interest in becoming a nonprofit leader to be different. So it could be: I want to become a nonprofit leader because I want to help social innovations and impact organizations build resilient employees and organizations. The above has substance and is personally related to your personal identity or the core challenge that you have noticed in the industry. What makes the extraordinary different from the ordinary is a Compelling WHY; the purpose and drive from getting involved in an activity, a program, a business, a training or even something as mundane as why you pick a fight. Hal Elrod in his book, The Miracle Morning, said: “those who overcome the temptation of mediocrity to achieve everything they want in life have an extraordinarily compelling Why that drives them.” To be phenomenal and amazingly awesome, it is important to have a compelling reason that is at a deeper level for the things you are truly passionate about; a defining purpose that is free from the drive and activities of others; that is distinctive and uniquely you.